Iran Opinion on the Arizona Persian Page [ Reply | Next | Previous | Up ]
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Salaam be hame doostane azizam,
I read, enjoyed ….. Then studied and contemplated my feelings about both of these exquisitely articulated articles. Now, I have this irresistible urge to offer my humble opinion…lol.. The fact that these articles have stirred-up a discussion here in our forum is an indication (at least TO ME) that we all know.. Deep inside….they are both right. Of course, it is evident that both writers are well educated and have great penmanship. It is also obvious, ke moaazoo-ro hesabi charb o chilish kardan. But, the principal of the matter - is a fact, and a part of our Iranian mentality….No matter how much we deny it. In reference to "Loving an Iranian Woman"… First let me introduce myself. I do not drive a BMW. But, I am a MBZ driving, cell phone-carrying, club hopping, lady…lol. I am no doctor or engineer, but an executive, in a large firm. I do wear three pounds of makeup and hair spray. On occasion I have been seen wearing a mini skirt or two. I am still (as my dad put it couple of hours ago) dokhtareh nazeh baba. I despise Shahram Nazri, Shahram K….you ready for this??? And Hafez. Why?? (answer to all the whys are provided at the end) Aaaand, for all you hopeless romantic guys…. I don't like midnight strolls on the beach..just you, me and the moon. I much rather stay home with that someone special and watch a real stupid yet funny movie. uhhhhh, and the most amazing fact, I am not torshideh. As matter of fact I am zood az ab gerefteh. Anyhow, much to my surprise, every single - single man I have conversed with, either online or through the infamous Iranian friends/matchmakers… these gentlemen are all aggressively looking for a wife (every single one, without an exception). Or, perhaps I am naive enough to believe it. I don't know… In any event, when I inform these hard to trap eligible bachelors of my present state of seeking solitude, they somehow presume naz mikonam. Or, they assume as soon as I lay eyes on them, I will drop everything and fall helplessly in love and runaway to ends of the earth with them. As a matter of fact, last time I heard the phrase "my biological clock is ticking" was from my most most most favorite online buddy/hard to trap eligible bachelor. He said, his biological clock was not only ticking, but it was running out of batteries. He is my dadash now...lol. Upon conversing with these debonair eligible bachelors - AKA, gifts from God - I do ask their age. I do not ask about their education or profession. I take everyone at face value. I judge them on their behavior and actions. I do not ask about their marital status. I assume they are honest enough to honor their commitment and respects their involvement with another, rather than lah lah zadan poshte sare har ki ke gireshoon miyad. To be honest, I am a little cynical of the man (or woman for that matter) who hasn't been able to find "THE RIGHT ONE" for a decade or two. I guess, this portrays he/she isn't willing to compromise with another in order to settle-down. I said compromise, not settle for less - there is a difference. In my opinion, no two beings are the same. In order for two to become one, both must let go of some of the extra baggage hanging around. And, I don't buy the…. ohhhh, why can't we be our own individual… I realize, I am walking on thin ice here, but that is opinion. Okh okh….Now, my favorite part… cheshm o goosh basteh… fekr mikonid kee cheshm o gooshe-shoon ro baz kardeh???..lol.. Azizeh dele man, what goes around comes around. That is how the universe was designed. I personally find this double standard extremely insulting. I have never been able to comprehend or digest the fact, that it is commendable for my son or brother to score; but, it is unacceptable for my daughter or sister to do the same. It is a matter of fact - the female gender matures earlier in life emotionally and mentally. And strictly, for your information, I disapprove of scoring <G> regardless of age and gender. I may make an exception, between mature adults who intend to have long term commitment. A piece of paper is not required, but a commitment of hearts…. IS. There is an issue of God and khotbeh ye aghd…. But I am still working on that one. Now, "loving an Iranian man" I am also, that woman who is totally confused about her culture. But, NOT her beliefs. Even though I went to junior high, high school, and university here in the United States; I think, I am much more of a traditional Iranian woman, than some of my old friends, neighbors, and relatives who are still in Iran. (I started to write why I am more Iranian than most Iranian women in Iran… but that is another 3 pages.. we'll save it for next time. For now, just take my word). What is the difference between an American and an Iranian woman/men?? Maarefat. What is maarefat in english? Do they even have a word for it? Do they know what it is? Please reply if you have answer, I'm anxious to know. Back to the subject at hand, An iranian man/woman has marefat. Atefeh. Hamoon eshgheh o atefeh be khanevadeh. Living in California I've had the opportunity to get to know many people from around the globe. Looking at Americans, Hispanics, Orientals, and other cultures, I don't see oon eshgh o mohabate madare irooni. It is true, mohit is a factor in our behavior. But, a far more influential factor in who we are - is tabaa o jens. These traits are not learned, dar khoonemooneh. I have never dated an American man. Now that I think of it, I have never even dated an Iranian man. I just married one. Well, except for that one shopping trip to buy this beautiful state of the arts PC. Is that considered a date??…lol…I do admit that I enjoy the company of a BMW-driving, cell-phone carrying, club hopping chauvinistic pig. Why??? (remember answers to the whys are at the end). Loving an Iranian man is not easy. No matter how educated, how liberated, or how shik he is… he still has the image of his father, grandfather, and uncles in the back of his mind. What is that image?? It is MARD SALARI. After all that, isn't it amazing that these two obviously very intellectuals beings, khanoomeh Laleh va Hamid agha, del ro be daste ham zaboon dadan. An American, European or whomever you choose as your mate will never know jomaeh-ha(Fridays) bagh raftan ba khaleh o amoo o dar o hamsayeh yani chi. They can not comprehend or begin to imagine the joy…the experience…… ke chador-e shab zireh derakhteh toot migeriftim o hame bacheha balaye derakht miraftan o derakht ro tekoon midadand… maman-a-moon chador be kamar basteh (mesleh ghamar khanoom) dad mizadan.. aayyyy zalil mordeh movazeb bash… khoda begam oon baba-tu chi kar koneh… oooy haji biya in var parideh ro begir ke aajezam kard …mak…. Of course being yeki ye dooneh, I never heard that…lol... I am willing to bet my life, most of you have a big smile on your face right now. You know why? Because you know exactly what I am talking about….You can see it… No matter how much or how well you try, a non-Iranian mate will never know where you're coming from, or what is really in your heart. No matter how much we try to run-away from who we are, ultimately we return to our roots. What I expressed above, is not all about me…it is about most Iranian women here… Now, answer to all the whys…this applies only to me, not all my sisters… At this moment in my life, unlike a few years or months ago, I am secure enough to admit, I prefer being shallow according to most standards. I do not enjoy rattling my brain to understand hafez. I do not want to be an intellectual. I do not even want to think. I will not compromise my standards to please my man. I will not go for a midnight walk on the beach. Simply because I don't like the feeling of sand in between my toes. Why be uncomfortable just because that's the thing to do when you want to portray romance. I prefer the company of BMW driving, cell phone carrying, club hopping chauvinistic pig far more than the serious intellectual who enjoys debating - politics or Plato. I want a simple happy life with no complications. I no longer save or care about money. I no longer care what people think. I choose my own path now, while honoring what is most important to me. My children and my heritage. I hope, I can bestow these remarkable traditional qualities to my children. I try to preserve and pass on..rasm o roosoom .. haya o nejabat...tarbiat o aadaab (traditions)…atefeh o marefat…va az hame mohem-tar oon eshgh o rooh-e asl-e irooni. And personally, I believe the ability to totally khod ra be daste khoda sepordan is a virtue, and not too many of us are capable of doing that…that is a very personal belief. But I figured hala ke bala-yeh mambar neshashtam yavashaki in ra ham ghatish konam…lol. In conclusion, tool o deraz shod.. faghat mikhostam du khat benevisam… lol… In conclusion, Right or wrong… does not matter. That is who I am. That is what I believe. I am an iranian woman.
Golparam@aol.com
From:
Date: 16 Mar 2004
Time: 05:54:58
Remote Name: 212.181.114.30
iran From: sm Date: 22 Sep 2002 Time: 20:43:13 Remote Name: 205.188.208.70 Sm wrote Comments what can i say turks brought mollas to iran im married to a turk its been 14yrs of hell. It's sadly sometimes to read how ignoratn some people are of a situation. The one how brought the mollas was not turks. That's incorrect . If you would know the real answer you shall ask the diffrent political forces( parties which tok a place in teh revultion ). I don't think you can get A whole picture by reading the material that is presebnted today , sadly. But as far as I know It wasen't a ethnic gruop in minor which brugth the molas to power. They did it themself be the fact that the other parties of Iran was not comapartion with eac other , instead them fight agains each other whwihc created a emptyness what the molla took. That the story in a very short text . aND SADLY TO SAY IT WAS ACUATLLY ONE OF THE PARTIES FAULT, THE FADAYIN, THEY MADE A STUPID MISTAKE. A VERY STUPID MISTAKE, BUT THATS HISTORY. I WOULD BE GLAD IF EVERYBODY JOINED IN A FRONT AGAINST THE CURRENT REGIME AND NOT ECUASING EACHOTHER. THOUHGT THAT YOU ARE EXPERINSING A BAD ECOMOMIC SITUATION SPECCIALY IN THE REGIONS WHICH IS NOT OF PERSIAN BACKGROUND. IT SAID THTA PEOPLE LIKE SM AND OTHER BLAIM EACH OTHER THEN TEH REGIEM WHICH HAVE PUT THEM IN THIS SITAUATION. ..AND FINALLY AS AI SAID IT WAS NOT THE AZERBAYJAINS AS SOMEONE CLAIM THAT THEY BROUGHT THE REGIME , NO IT WAS ANAOTHER PARTIE BUT AS IA SAID TO SHOUDL'T BLAIM EACH OHTER FOR SOMETHING THAT HAPPNED IN THE PASTE, THATS REDECOULSES. TO POINT OUT WHO WAS THE REAL TO BLIAM IS REDICULIS , IT DEOSNT HELP YOU , OR DOES IT . IT ONLY MAKS THE SIATUATIOIN WORSE, AND THE MOLLAS ARE AWARE OF THAT AND USES THE POTENTINAL CRISI AND MAKES' THEM MORE DEEP. THE USE THE CONFLICT WHICH BEETWEN THE PEOPLE OF IARN WHICH AHVE BEEN BROUGHT UNDER THE COLONIAL PERIOD. . so my sugestion is that you don't each ohter and use offensive words. correct me if I am wrong . hope to hear from you regards